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RotRR: Episode 3

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The next day, through all the surrounding boredom, Leonidas and friends (Roxanoid and surprisingly Raphoon) resort to making commercials…

( Leonidas, in ball form, is in front of a white screen )

( Raphoon and Roxanoid, also in ball forms, are away from Leonidas, but still pretty close to Leonidas )

Leonidas) ...do I have to do this…

Raphoon) No, you can walk out and hibernate in shame.

Roxanoid) Can you two just stop fighting already? ROX-A-NOID doesn’t think it ROX at all!

Raphoon) NO, REVENGE WILL BE MI-

Leonidas) Raphoon says nothing. Now shut up.

(Oppa Gangnam Style begins playing.)

Leonidas) *Rolls on screen and bursts open.* ♪Eh-eh-eh-eyyy, PISTACHIOS! Crack, crack, crack, Crackin’ Gangnam Style!♫

Raphoon) BOO!

Cameraman) Quiet you!

Raphoon) Mr. Cameraman...Or Val...YOU BE QUIET!

Cameraman) You’re fired!

Valentin) *Comes on.* The heck is going on?

Raphoon) HE FIR- Wait…*Looks at screen Val and the cameraman* Two Vallyvals?

Nintendo) *Comes on screen, still possessing Ray* Lolwut?

Raphoon) WHERE’S THE BABY, MURDERER?!

Nintendo) In his crib, sleeping.

Valentin) ...can someone tell me why Leonidas is the middle of four chicks in pistachio costumes? And why is Nintendo still possessing Ray?

Leonidas) O.O I AM?! WHERE?! *Looks around.*

Raphoon) HAHA!

Valentin) My bad, camera effects. *Grins.*

Leonidas) … -_-

Nintendo) I’m still possessing Ray because the baby only likes it when she’s mothering him. .-.

Raphoon) HAHAHAHA, MY COMMERCIAL WILL BE SO MUCH BETTER!

Cameraman) Back to shooting the commercial!

Leonidas) ♪Crack, Crack, Crack! Crack That Roadkill Style!♫

Raphoon) ...That piece of his hated Pistachio Ice Cream Cake thinks I’m roadkill? HAHA NO!

Cameraman) PERFECT! Wait, that’s not in the script! What are you-

Roxanoid) STICK TO THE SCRIPT, YOU OLD FARTS!

Raphoon) I...I thought we were friends, Roxilocks…

Roxanoid) WELL WE WON’T BE IF YOU DON’T STICK TO THE SCRIPT!

Raphoon) Fine...I’ll shut up...Leonidas, you better be happy...Continue your commercial now or I may steal your spotlight for my glorious attention!

Leonidas) ♪Eat these pistachios, they are very good for you-

Cameraman) No, no, no, stop. Again.

Leonidas) But-

Cameraman) …

Leonidas) Fine.

Valentin) Go, Leo! *Smirks.*

Leonidas) *Sings.* ♫Crack, Crack, Crack! Cracking’ Gangnam Style!♪

Backstage Singers) ♪EEEEEEEEEEEYYY PISTACHIOS!♫

Leonidas) ♫Crack, Crack, Crack!♪

All) ♪EH EH EH!♫

Leonidas) ♪Crackin’ Style!♫

Valentin) *Claps.* Nice!

Leonidas) *Bows.* Thank you! Thank you very much! *Rolls away.*

Raphoon) My turn! My turn-turn-turn! *Rolls up the white screen* Val, adios, bye...GET OUT OF MY SHOOT!

Valentin) Raphoon, want a raise?

Leonidas) >:O HEY! HOW COME I DON’T GET ONE!

Valentin) *Winks.*

Leonidas) Oh, OK! >:D

Cameraman) EVERYONE, I don’t have all day, back to script!

Raphoon) *Stares at Val’s face* I want you gone...I want you gone...But fine, you can stay...My act has no script, Mr. Cameraman in disguise.

Cameraman) Need a script, get off stage NOW!

Raphoon) This is a floor with a white screen, what stage is here?

Cameraman) You get the point.

Raphoon) Roxilocks, does this Cameraman rox or not?

Roxanoid) THE CAMERAMAN ROX LIKE SOX!

Raphoon) …

Cameraman) …

Raphoon) …

Cameraman) …

Raphoon) ATTENTION! THE CAMERAMAN SUCKS, MY DEAR OLD FRIEND, YOU NEED THE THIRST FOR REVENGE!

Roxanoid) OH NO, REVENGE!

Raphoon) OH YES, REVENGE!

Leonidas’ Backstage Singers) SWEET REVENGE!

Raphoon) OH NO, you may say, but OH YES, is what you need to say. When you face life or deaaaaaaaaaaaaath, you need to take REVENGE!

Roxanoid) Revenge isn’t right!

Raphoon) What if you’re tortured? What will you do? You will take REVENGE and I’m all for you! This ATTENTION! seeking, REVENGE listening, gentle-bakugan loving, spikeball raccoon will always save you!

Roxanoid) …I give up.

Raphoon) You know, everyday I want the attention I deserve. This commercial will give me that…

Cameraman) We’re recording this right now, you know… <.<

Raphoon) And with this commercial, I get to air what I hold special, which is REVENGE!

Cameraman) <.<

Raphoon) REVENGE ON THE RUSSIAN LIZARD AND HIS MASTER! *Hops to Val’s mouth, on the white screen* I’LL GO DOWN HIS DA

Cameraman) - ENOUGH!

( Scratching sounds of claws and the slamming of feet are heard nearby )

Raphoon) NO, YOU’RE THINKING OF THE WRONG

Cameraman) - NO, SERIOUS, ENOUGH...THIS COMMER-

Raphoon) DANG MOUTH, GO DOWN HIS THROAT...FALL...AND FALL...AND SCREEEEEEEEEAAAAAAM FOR ATTENTION AND GET MY REVENGE...THIS SPIKEBALL WILL CUT THIS GUYS THROAT - Hey, where’s that Russian Liz-

( A dog stands near the entrance, with Leonidas on top of him )

Raphoon) Oh great...

Val) Leonidas, what the heck are you doing with Zip-

Leonidas) ARE YOU CALLING ME A SWINE?!

( The dog runs towards Raphoon )

Raphoon) ATTENTION, STOP!

( The dog doesn’t stop )

Val) I got a really bad feeling ‘bout this-

Leonidas) ARE YOU CALLING ME A SWINE?!

Raphoon) PLEASE?! YOU DON’T NEED THE REVENGE I NEED!

Leonidas) I SAID, ARE YOU CALLING ME A SWINE?!

Val) Someone’s been watching WAY too much Lion King...

Raphoon) *Starts rolling away* YOU SUCK!

( The dog’s paw kicks, Raphoon, but Raphoon gets stuck via his spikes )

Raphoon) CRAP!

( The dog turns around and runs the other way now )

Leonidas) GIDDYUP, ZIPPER. EAT HIM!

Zipper) *The dog.* Gruff?

Leonidas) EAT HIM, DARN YOU- never mind.

Raphoon) *Sound disappearing in the distance* I WILL GET MY REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEENNN-

Cameraman) Well, that’s definitely not going to air...Roxanoid, hit the stage, it’s your turn to shine!

Roxanoid) *Rolls in front of the screen still showing Val, but it quickly changes to Nintendo* ♪PISTACHIOS ARE FUN TO EAT! THEY MAKE A DELICIOUS TREAT! BUT I’M NOT SURE IF THEY’RE MADE OF MEAT! PISTACHIOS~!♫

Zipper) Woof!

Val) *Facepalm.*

Leonidas) o_e *Hides.* NO!

Val) He’s got a point - they’re not made of meat.

Nintendo) True.

Leonidas) …

Zipper) *Confused.*

Val) Zipper, shoo. I’ll be right over.

Zipper) Woof! *Runs off.*

Val) Good boy.

RotRR: Episode 3 was...?
 
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The poll was created at 18:36 on September 15, 2013, and so far 0 people voted.

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